


Everybody's Rushing Me, But I Can Feel You Touching Me

by srowe23555



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol, Angst, Drugs, Emotional Abuse, M/M, Mention of Death, Physical Abuse, Toxic Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-12
Updated: 2014-05-12
Packaged: 2018-01-24 13:19:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1606607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/srowe23555/pseuds/srowe23555
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and Louis are so bad for each other but that doesn't matter because they're in love</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everybody's Rushing Me, But I Can Feel You Touching Me

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from Lana Del Rey's 'Dark Paradise'.  
> I do not condone this kind of relationship or behaviour. I am fully aware of the kind of relationship they have, but that doesn't mean I think it's ok.

George Orwell once said that "people sleep peacefully in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." Louis doesn't know who George Orwell is, but he thinks he might be right.   
~  
"You can't keep letting him treat you like that, Lou" Zayn says one day.  
"I love him." He lets his sleeves fall back down to cover the purple flowers sprouting from his veins.  
~  
"Stop it, stop doing this to me!"  
"I'm doing this because I love you, Louis!" Harry lets his knuckles crack against the soft skin of Louis' cheek.  
He just does it because he loves him. Louis deserves it.  
~  
Harry tells Louis how beautiful he is when he cries. Still, Louis makes sure to not let his tears fall.  
~  
"Let's go out" Harry tells Louis one night. So they wear their finest clothes and they go to a fancy restaurant and they drink expensive wine. Even if it's completely out of their depth and they sneak out without paying because no one can afford a $200 bottle of fermented grapes, really.   
When they get home, Harry pushes him into the mattress. But it's ok, because Louis loves him, and Harry is rough but he loves him too.   
~  
Louis thinks a good way to describe Harry is like the ocean. Because the ocean is calm and peaceful and beautiful, but it still tears holes in ships and drowns those who stay too long and fills the lungs of those incapable of bearing its endless hammering of waves on the sand.   
Louis' never been to the ocean before.  
~  
"Faggots." Louis doesn't know the man who spits this at them when they're walking on the street at 2am. He doesn't have time to recognise him before Harry gets to him, anyway.  
Louis lets him carry him the rest of the way home. He tries to ignore the dead man in the alley and the torn skin on Harry's knuckles.   
"I love you" he makes sure to whisper. He doesn't say it, but Harry loves him too.  
~  
Harry thinks a good way to describe Louis is like drug. Because drugs can make you feel things and they take the pain away, but they stay in your veins and slowly kill your mind and your body and your soul and you don't realise until it's too late to stop it all.  
Harry think Louis is the worst drug of all.  
~  
"Come for a walk" Louis tells Harry one night. He doesn't want to, but he won't tell Louis. Instead he puts on his shoes and his coat and he helps Louis into his and they smoke cigarettes and drink whiskey and they feel more at home when they're sitting at a deserted park than they do in their own bed.  
When they get home, Louis whispers dark thoughts in Harry's ear. But it's ok, because Harry loves him, and Louis' words are tendrils but he loves him too.  
~  
Louis tells Harry how beautiful he is when he's gentle with him. Still, Harry doesn't hold back.  
~  
"I try so hard to please you, Harry, but it's never enough. You always screw it up."  
"You make me feel like crap. Why do you make me hate myself?" Harry spits at him.   
Honestly, Louis doesn't know what he does. But Harry gives as good as he takes. So when Harry hates himself, he makes sure Louis hates himself too.  
~  
"He hurts you, Harry" Niall says one day.  
"I love him." Harry doesn't care that Louis' words are poison.  
~  
George Orwell once said that "people sleep peacefully in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." Harry doesn't know who George Orwell is, but he thinks he might be right.


End file.
